Yes. Yes I am. And now I have proof!
Oct 112010
Jul 132010
I can’t stop saying that. I, as of yesterday morning, have my first car. hubby got home Saturday, and as planned we went to start looking on Sunday. What we didn’t plan on was finding a vehicle that day that we couldn’t pass up. Nor was I sure we could even get financed, since I’d only cleared our credit card debt (again) a couple months ago. But we found one, and we did.
We were looking for an SUV. Either a Yukon, Expedition, or Tahoe. The salesman came out, and gave us the info on the Suburban we were checking out, and asked about what we needed. I was leary, but he wanted to show us this van. I didn’t WANT a van, I WANT an SUV I thought. But…this little number changed my tune. A 2007 Chevy Uplander. Chevy’s discontinued attempt at a Van SUV crossover. It sat there, all shiny, like it had barely been driven at all. With only 37,000 miles on it. It’s dvd player, Airconditioning (front AND rear, and it has that sectional AC control thing) power everything, remote keyless entry, rear bumper backup warnings, cd player, traction control, ABS brakes, power seats (well drive’s seat at least) all saying “you know you want me”. Then came the price. 17.8k. That was just in our budget. So we test drive it, and I fall in love with it. We try the financing, but being Sunday had to wait til Monday to hear. Or so we thought.
We got our answer Sunday night. it was ours. Monday morning we went to pick it up, and they had lowered that 17.8k to 14.6k. We got a nice 10% interest rate, and the loan went through a credit union. Hubby drove her home, I drove the truck home…I DROVE INTERSTATE 5!!!! That was a first!
My amazing husband, who’s idea it was to put off his motorcycle until GA in favor of a second, comes home, and gets me, my very first car. I am a lucky, lucky, LUCKY woman.
Jan 162010
If you talk to a military spouse, they’re likely to tell you the thing they hear most is "I don’t know how you do it". I personally find it hard to form the right response to that question. It’s hard to answer without sounding like you’re over confident, so I usually laugh it off. My typical response is "I don’t know either!" or something like that.
The fact is though, I know how I do it. It takes one word. Faith.
I’ve rarely if ever spoken about my beliefs in my blog. Not because I don’t have them, but because for me, personally, my beliefs are something I hold quietly. However, I’m making an exception today.
I was born and raised in a little country Methodist church in a teeny town in Pennsylvania. Most Sundays you could find me sitting next to my Gram, quietly coloring on that week’s bulletin. My Mom, in the choir peeking my way to make sure I was still behaving. This wasn’t the town we lived in however. We lived about 30 minutes away. I was born there, but we moved when I was 3, after my parents divorced, to make my Mom’s commute to work better in those nasty PA winters. But we still went to church with my gram. I was baptized there, married there, and my first child was baptized there.
Anyhow, i was raised basically with one belief. My mom basically shortened it to "everything happens for a reason". I’ll never remember every sermon given in my childhood, but I do remember the recurring theme that God has a plan for everyone, and we just don’t know what it is. But, everything happens for a reason, and my life thus far proves it.
I had a bad breakup with a guy in October of 1991. It was a serious relationship, we were engaged, and when it ended I was crushed. My Mom of course said if it was meant to be it would. Four days later…I met the man I am married to today.
A year and a half after that, I was married, and having my first child. We struggled for 9 years. The worst of it came in 1999, after we had moved across the state for a job and the owner fired Hubby’s entire shift. We returned home, and he opted to go for his CDL and try and land a job as a truck driver.
Sadly, the financing for the school fell through. At the time, we thought it was a terrible thing. But good came after. He ended up with a job we could live with, and moved out where his Dad’s side of the family lived. Allowing him to form a relationship with his Dad and a whole "new" side of the family. My Dad had passed away shortly after we got married, and I was, and still am thrilled that he got this chance. Not everyone gets a second one.
He also, after 9/11 then joined the Army, being that his job wasn’t taking him anywhere, we were still struggling, and had zero health care, and he was good and TICKED off about the events that had happened on that day.
And has thus far had a very good career with it. We don’t struggle near as much these days. But I wouldn’t trade those years we did. I appreciate everything much more NOW having had next to nothing those years, than I would have otherwise. Had trucking school worked out…we would have missed out on alot.
When he delivered the news that we’d be moving next year, my first instinct was panic, and find a way out of it. But when I stopped to take a breath, I realized that maybe it was just what was supposed to be. What would we miss out on if we DID get out of it? Everything I have ever wanted to fight or change and haven’t been able to has brought with it a blessing of some kind.
I didn’t want to come to Ft Lewis just a few months after he returned from Iraq in 2006. I wanted to stay in Alaska with my friends, where I knew my way around, and where I wasn’t near a big city. But we moved. Shortly after we settled in here, his old unit deployed back to Iraq. Almost a year after the first deployment. We, however, wound up with just shy of 3 years between his last deployment and this one. I’d call that a blessing.
Deployments are hard. Especially on the spouse and kids. And of course I have bouts of panic, and worry, and frustration. Oh and impatience, I haven’t quite found THAT virtue just yet. But at the end of the day, I just have faith that he’ll be ok. WE will be ok. I don’t worry as much about how he’ll be when he comes home, or readjusting to living together again. I have faith in him, in our marriage and of course, in God. That’s how I do it.
A one word answer. Faith. I may have spent my time in that church coloring pictures in this week’s bulletin, but something sunk in.
Yesterday was October 25. And I said when it came I would answer Bre’s Question. So here goes.
October 25, 1991, I was 17 and four days earlier had ended a fairly bad relationship. But in typical "me" fashion, I sucked it up, and got over it. This night, I was hanging out with friends at the mall. In the town we lived in, this was about the only thing us teenagers had to do on weekends. upon arriving, I ran into my best friend Tiffi, and stopped to talk.
Now, There was this guy, Ken, who I’d seen hanging out there almost every weekend for at least the last year. He had the most beautiful blue eyes I have ever seen. And he always had a hug for anyone that wanted one. I’d always thought he was hot, but he was always just out of reach. The first and only time we almost got to talk he got kicked out of the mall by an angry mall cop. I was sitting with a group of friends, and Kevin (Who by the way, Ironically enough, is married to my sister in law now!), one of Ken’s friends told him to come sit with us. Unfortunately Mister Mall Cop had just told Ken "and don’t move again!". So when he came to sit right beside me…that asshole threw him out of the mall. I was soooo close, but my chance was snatched away.
But on October 25, 1991 I had my chance. Ken walks up to where Tiffi and I are, and he hugs her, he hugs me, and he stands there one arm around each of us. Tiffi says to him "hey, I’m supposed to hook you up with one of my friends". I, the LEAST forward and flirtatious among my friends, said "How ’bout me??". And Ken, in his typical, laid back, easy going way simply says…"ok". That was it. OK. Tiffi eventually forgave me for hijacking her match making attempt too…thanks Tiff!
We started going out that night, and for the next year. We had our ups and downs, and close calls. But on October 25th 1992, He gave me the surprise of my life. you see, my grandmother had an engagement ring. It was meant to be given to the man I would marry. However, she told me at one point she had sold it. I was a bit disappointed but I knew she was having a hard time so I understood.
That night, Ken came to my house. He asked me to go put on one of my formal dresses. I looked at him with a raised eyebrow, but did it anyhow. He then led me to my bedroom, put me up on my desk stool. And he turned on some music. My eyes are closed, as requested, when I hear him ask me to marry him. And I feel something being put on my finger. When I said yes, in tears, I opened my eyes, to see my grandmother’s diamond ring on my finger. I immediately flew out the door, grabbed the phone, and called my grandmother to tell her what a sneaky old woman she was. That’s when Ken followed me and said he wasn’t done yet! I hung up, and he took me back to my room, where he formally asked me to dance. And this was the song.
Three months later, I found out I was pregnant with our first daughter. We were 19, he was working in fast food, we had very little. When he came to my house after work, and I told him I was pregnant…he again reacted with his typical no panic, laid back "ok". He’s always been my rock. Even as young as we were, he’s always been the one to stay calm, and wait for me to stop panicking about something, and we work it out.
Until I met him, I’d never cried out of pure happiness, I didn’t know what love really was. And this may be TMI, but even though I’d lost my virginity a few years before, I didn’t know what all the fuss was about sex. I didn’t understand "making love" until I met him. 18 years later, he still shows me every day what love really is. We’ve been through it all, and nothing has broken us. I still feel like I did 18 years ago, only stronger.
Could I live without him? There’s no way.
Mar 192009
Sixteen years. That’s how long we have been married. As of last Thursday. And he still manages to surprise me. I go in to the bedroom to change, and as I turned to leave something caught my eye. Lying on my pillow were three perfect red roses. Which I might add are still thriving a week later. It kinda reminds me of us.
I know when we got married there were doubts about us making it. There always are. We were only 19 at the time. And the odds were set against us, as they are with any marriage. But we defied the odds thus far. Even when he joined the army, which has even higher odds against us, we defied them. But how?
It’s easy. Too many couples these days either overthink getting married, or don’t think enough about it at all. Usually the latter. And it’s treated so often as just another boy girl relationship. We see it pretty often in the Army, young couples jump in head first, and soon realize that marriage on it’s own isn’t as easy as they thought, and that is compounded by the demands and stresses the military can put on it. Rather than work their way through it, they give up. Sometimes at the first roadblock, sometimes at the next. But theygive up, and treat it just like breaking up when they were dating.
It hasn’t always been easy for us, but we put in the effort, and adjust, overcome. It’s not always rainbows and roses, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.
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