Sometimes staying positive can be a challenge. Some days it’s such a challenge I wonder if I’m up to it. But I always come around. I just can’t dwell on the negative. It does noone any good. Least of all my Husband. Sure it’s good for him to know I miss him, and hate being without him. But it’s more important for him to NOT be worried about how I’m coping. If he is secure in knowing that I’m going to kick this deployment’s ass, he can go about his job without worrying about home. I think I do pretty well most of the time. It’s a challenge to take care of him from a distance but I’ve found a few ways. And since I’ve slacked off on my "5′s" lately. Here’s 5 positive things I do to make HIS life easier/better.
1. When writing letters, I update him on the daily goings on if there are any to report. Which kid got a bad grade, which kid got a stomach bug, which dog crapped in the kitchen (usually HIS dog) that kind of thing. If nothings going on, I go with mushy love letters (so easy to be mushy with him, he brings out the best in me).
2. I’ve started dropping by his facebook and leaving messages. lovey dovey stuff, love songs, cute little graphics, etc. Now that the FOB has an internet cafe set up, he’ll get them. There wasn’t any point before now, but it’s fun.
3. Use my support network. If I need to let loose with a round of whining, or ranting, I have people to text, call, email, IM, etc. I never burden him with it. He knows it happens of course. But he is very much "fix it" kind of guy, like most guys are. It would only frustrate him to not be able to fix it.
4. I listen. Ok, he’ll tell you himself I talk too much. But I can listen. And I’m lucky, in the fact that he will talk to me about the rough stuff he goes through. I love that he does this. First of all because it’s better that he talk about it now than shoving it all down. And second, because no matter what it is he’s facing over there, I’d rather know the brutal truth of what’s going on around him, than be sheltered from it. I know that might sound strange, but knowing how bad things are leaves me with no surprises. I enjoy listening to him, and it feels good to know he knows I can take it.
5. Boxes! I love sending him things. I keep some things kind of secret so I’m the only one sending that particular thing to him. Selfish, maybe but I’m his wife, I get to have special things with him…lol
I still can’t wait until he is home again. I miss doing things for him, and spoiling him rotten. But for now long distance will have to do. Focusing on making him happy has the wonderful side effect of making me happy. Love is a wonderful thing.
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